Things have been hard lately
Not like, oh I am so busy, things are hard.
But like gut-wrenching, when is this ever going to stop, one thing after another, not enough time, money, energy, care to deal with all of the things that need dealt with to make my life even slightly appear together. Loss, not enough, things keep getting taken away, I’m-feeling-a-little-like-Job-over-here, has been my daily story for months now.
And the moment I get through one thing, another one pops up.
Man, I am exhausted.
What my family and I have gone through in the past year is enough to make any sane person just give up and walk away.
If I look at the things going on around me, it just all looks.. impossible
But you see, here’s the thing. God gave my family a word, His word. God gave us a vision. God gave us a promise. God gave us a direction.
And a funny thing about God that I am learning is that He doesn’t speak like the world speaks.
The world speaks loud.
The world is constantly screaming at us that we need to do this - not that, wear this - not that, say this - not that. One thing is cool one day and the next day it’s not. One day we feel & even look like we have it all together, but the next day we have totally failed. One day we are at the top of our game, but then, just like the tide changes, the world changes the definition of success and we are behind, again.
God - on the other hand – speaks quietly and when He does, He never changes it. He never takes it back.
He speaks and it lasts.
He speaks and it is what you need, when you need it and when you wake up in the morning, it is still there.
The wisdom. The direction. The next step. It is all wrapped up in the typically very short, very succinct thing that God last said.
And even when it looks like what God said isn’t going to work, even when it looks like God was wrong (if you are brave enough to think that way), even when something happens & nothing is going according to plan, and you don’t know what to do - God’s word still stands. It’s still there. Strong. Lasting. Forever.
When everything is crashing down around me & it looks like I should just give up on the promise, God’s word speaks louder than the voice telling me to just quit. God’s word makes me keep going. God’s word makes me keep hanging on. God’s word makes me look for a way out that I wouldn’t have seen unless I looked because He promises it would always be there.
And guess what? When I look for it, I find it.
When it looks like I am up against a wall and stuck in a total failure and all of the hope for something to be different is lost… if I stop, and remember that God’s ways are not mine, and that means He always has a different way that I haven’t thought of, and I ask Him to show me His way, He does.
I was having a conversation with my son, my 16 year old who was going through a hard time. He was being treated unfairly. And it wasn’t just a feeling, it was straight up unfair. My momma bear instincts came out and all I wanted to do was drive over to the person who was treating him unfairly and give them a piece of my mind. My heart was breaking for my kid.
Because I knew that this was one of those moments that he was going to remember. This was one of those pivotal life moments that he was going to look back on and think about the way that he was treated and I knew this moment had the potential to derail him. It was one of those times in life that he was being presented with the opportunity to get bitter. To be a victim of harsh, unfair treatment and stay stuck there, a victim. And all I could see in that moment was my kid, looking back on this time years from now and realizing that this was the moment where it all started to go wrong. Where unforgiveness gripped his heart and bitterness became his frenemy.
I was devastated for him. I was starting to panic. It was all too much. All of the things going on in my life, and then my kid going through this hard time. I could feel the weight of it all starting to pile up on me and I felt like the air was sucked out of my lungs.
This was it. This was the thing that was going to push me over the edge of what I can handle. This was the definition of too much. If it wasn’t too much before, it definitely was now. The lies were coming in quick, the anxiety was grabbing a hold of my heart.
But then, His quiet voice stopped me in my tracks. “It doesn’t have to be that way.”
And I just said to God, “I need You.”
It really was the most un-fanciest prayer ever.
I just said, “Please don’t let this be his story.” Don’t let this be the way he looks back on this time in his life. Don’t let this be the moment that derails him, that he has to heal from.
And God, in His infinite wisdom, allowed me to see a small sliver of light. There is another way. He began to speak to my heart. This could either be the moment that derails him or the moment that catapults him into his destiny. My kid had a choice: Use these moments to push you forward or allow this to be glue and keep you stuck.
So I presented my kid with the choice. And I saw God in action, producing the way out that He promised in His word.
And I remembered the word He spoke over my family, over my son. And I could breathe again. God stays true to His word. When He speaks, it doesn’t change from day to day, moment to moment, according to our circumstances or the tide or people’s ever-changing opinions or our ever-changing culture.
God’s word stays.
It lasts. It produces fruit. It accomplishes.
And so, here I am, still in this season.
While I sit and wait for God’s promises to be fulfilled, for His words to come alive in my life, I can breathe.
Even when it gets harder.
Even when little, silly things or big, hard things add up and pile on top of me and I feel like there’s no way out.
Even when the world screams so loud and everyone has their opinions and their voices seem to drown out God’s promises… they can’t.
Because His voice is the only one that matters. Because He not only has the way, He IS the way.
And when I am at the end of me, it is just the beginning of Him…
“He giveth more grace as our burdens grow greater
He sendeth more strength as our labors increase
To added afflictions, He addeth His mercy
To multiplied trials, He multiplies peace
When we have exhausted our store of endurance
When our strength has failed ere the day is half done
When we reach the end of our hoarded resources
The Father's full giving has only begun
Fear not that thy need shall exceed His provision
Our God ever yearns His resources to share
Lean hard on the arm everlasting, availing
The Father both thee and thy load will unbear
His love has no limits, His grace has no measure
His power no boundary known unto men
For out of His infinite riches in Jesus
He giveth, and giveth, and giveth again.”
-Benjamin William Hastings
And so you, my friend.
If you find yourself in one of those moments, or like me, a whole set of these seasons, just remember that when we “reach the end of our hoarded resources, the Father’s full giving has only begun.”
He hasn’t left you.
He hasn’t forgotten you.
Turn your heart and eyes to Him and He will “giveth and giveth, and giveth again. Whatever it is in that moment that you might need, He will be there. You can count on it.
“For as the rain and snow come down from heaven, And do not return there without watering the earth, Making it bear and sprout, And providing seed to the sower and bread to the eater, So will My word be which goes out of My mouth; It will not return to Me void (useless, without result), Without accomplishing what I desire, And without succeeding in the matter for which I sent it.”
Isaiah 55:10-11 AMP
“I am convinced and confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will [continue to] perfect and complete it until the day of Christ Jesus [the time of His return].”
Philippians 1:6 AMP
“But the Lord is faithful, and He will strengthen you [setting you on a firm foundation] and will protect and guard you from the evil one.”
2 Thessalonians 3:3 AMP
“God is faithful [He is reliable, trustworthy and ever true to His promise—He can be depended on], and through Him you were called into fellowship with His Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.”
1 Corinthians 1:9 AMP
“And my God will liberally supply (fill until full) your every need according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 4:19 AMP